I had an Abortion: please help me

Understanding your needs

Without doubt, making the decision to have an abortion is probably one of the most difficult and traumatic choices you’ve been faced with. Often these traumatic decisions are kept secret for fear of recrimination and judgement by those closest i.e. family and friends. Therefore it is my intention to offer immediate support ... providing hope, help and healing as swiftly as possible.

As a consequence of either contemplating or having experienced an abortion (or multiple abortions), you may share these common feelings expressed by some of my clients. The list below is not exhaustive; you may well have other feelings too:

• Anxiety or PAS (Post Abortion Stress)
• Despair
• Regret
• Shame
• Depression
• Guilt
• Blame
• Anger
• Feeling haunted
• Numbness
• Self recrimination
• Re-experiencing the abortion
• Anniversary syndrome
• Obsession with becoming pregnant

Considering that abortions are usually as a result of the limited choices available at the time of the decision, the above feelings are normal and to be expected given what you've been through.

Similarly, the negative consequences of bringing a child into this world could have been as a result of the judgement and stigma of your family, society or even on religious grounds. Other influencing factors could be your age or level of maturity, your partner, your income etc. Perhaps you were raped and decided abortion was the only option. What ever your reasons for having an abortion, and regardless of what others may think or say, you deserve and have the right to make peace with your decision.

Although having an abortion is often a great relief; the 'crisis' is finally over! Many of my clients have reported that over time an inner conflict emerged that challenged their ethics or morals; this inner struggle caused deep emotional anguish or pain affecting them physically, emotionally and spiritually.

Maybe you are thinking, “My life is a mess; abortion was my only option. I’ll have to live with the grief and heavy burden for the rest of my life.“ Or perhaps, “I deserve to be punished because I've sinned by having an abortion and taking a life.“ etc. Whatever your thinking, and in all probability you are trying to 'live with' these repressed painful memories that cannot be erased; no matter how hard you try ... the feelings or memories simply don’t go away!!! It is therefore common to experience guilt and haunting feelings, and this continual anguish and emotional pain can be debilitating and long lasting. One client had lived with guilt and self-punishment for more than 50 years, and could recall intimate details as if it were yesterday. Tragically, some clients have turned to addictions as a means of coping: in an attempt to tranquillise what they're thinking and feeling. Addictions may include alcohol, drugs, eating disorders, cutting, self punishment, excessive exercise etc.

Whatever you are experiencing, the remarkable power of Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) or ‘tapping’ can assist you in attaining peace with your choices and decisions. I assure you, EFT is a beautiful, non invasive and holistic approach that effortlessly facilitates the releasing of debilitating, burdensome emotions (or memories) thus enabling clients to move on with grace, peace and confidence. This relief is relatively quick and permanent, and without the need for endless counselling sessions. You have nothing to loose and everything to gain; your internal conflict and torture could be over much sooner than you think ...

The next step is to talk to someone and to this end as part of my service I provide a 20 minute initial conversation. I do not charge for this service as it serves a dual purpose (a) to provide you with some one to talk to and (b) to establish if counselling will be of value. As I'm often consulting during the day I cannot always take phone calls, please kindly complete the form below so I can get back to you and agree on an uninterrupted time for our private conversation.